Blips – The First Book of Video Game “Funnies” (1983) #1

It’s been four years since we failed to finish the series HERE… and still no-one has done it justice.  Why break a tradition, eh?

Here, again, may we be unfortunately pleased to present the first in a weekly series of excruciatingly unfunny pages from “The First book of Video Game Funnies”, penned originally by a terribly unfunny-now-unfunny-then gentleman called “Jovial Bob Stine”.

Maybe we’re being a little harsh, but the ancient tome which is about to be put under our scanner is very much a victim of it’s own cultural subject matter.

The videogame market has always been the same: fast moving, ultra trendy, ultra fanatic, uber fickle, ultra “LOL”.  Many modern gamers don’t own books, let alone read them.  At least their kids are forced to.

Looking back into the 80s, the resultant “comedy” is further malformed from it’s embarrassingly old references and the fact it was originally published in a country more famous for cheeseburgers than one-liners.

For the more youthful, ignorant and attention deficit of you, please note that when the “jokes” refer to the “coins” or “quarters”, it’s referring to a moment in the dark ages of gaming when people left their homes to PAY to play video games.

Also if you’re confused about the use of the term “can of soda” it means a “can of soda”. Before multinationals became too lazy to be bothered to distinguish between American’t English” and English English, and localise products accordingly, we would have called it a “can of pop” or “orangeade” and saved the bottletops for a 10p return. Thankfully all you cretins born too late to be useful will be quite used to the terms “soda”, “color”, “math”, “Will. I. Am” and “jerk-offs”.

And we didn’t need to edit out the “Will.I.Am” reference from 2008.  Somethings never go full retro.  Be thankful for that.

And that’s just the front cover.

More hilarity next time as we slowly post the whole horrible mess, page by page before someone gets the hump.


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