Pre-Pre-E3 Leaks are the new Pre-E3 Leaks, which were the E3 Leaks.

Well as reliable as ever the Internet – more specifically retail employees paid a minimum wage and on the edge of committing suicide in some dingy bedsit in Clapham – have began to ruin all the elements of surprise at E3 like a girlfriend who wants you to watch Breaking Bad but can’t help saying ‘Oh you like him? Shame he is killed by a lawnmower in series 10!’. So far we already know that Dead Rising 4 is a thing and may be a re-imagining of the first game with Frank West in a Mall at Christmas with 4 player co-op. Could be great, could end up being Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2.

We also know that Watch Dogs 2 is coming, that it has a new protagonist (gotta sell them figurines somehow, eh Ubisoft?) and is set in the big gay city, San Francisco. What hasn’t been made absolutely clear is that hacking is a big part of the gameplay. Heard it here first folks!

Injustice: Gods Among Us was great because it was:

  • From the Mortal Kombat team
  • Has massively over the top super moves
  • Has great interactive fight stages

AND

  • Allowed you to kick the shit out of the worst superhero in the world, Superman.

Well, Injustice 2 is on the way as well. So huzzah. Hopefully there will be a mini-game where you can set fire to people who complained about Batman V Superman: DOJ without actually seeing it.

Sony and Microsoft are supposed to be announcing new versions of their current-gen consoles, reportedly with 4K resolution to ensure that all those last-gen games on backwards compatability mode will look worse, pushing sales of remasters…

Skyrim remastered is rumoured as is a Red Dead remaster/sequel.

Prey 2 may be revealed. Again. Only this time it MIGHT actually get a release. How it will tie in-to the original and great Prey is as yet unknown. I think it will be the fact that it has Prey in the title.

Will Capcom be revealing Resident Evil 7 AND the HD remaster of Resi 2 and Nemesis? Leaks suggest a big YES.

Finally we have it on good authority that our friends at Microsoft are going to be releasing a HD remake of Jet Set Willy, but with full 3D vector visuals and the game reskinned to be a day from hell for everyone’s favourite cunt, Joey Essex. As Joey wanders around his mansion, hungover and confused (can you tell if Joey Essex is more confused than normal?) he has to find issues of TV Quick and Heat magazine that he featured in to make a collage for his mum who is visiting him and bring a cheesy bean bake.

The game we’ve all been waiting for!

We shall update this post if when more stuff leaks.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s